Tuesday, March 31

G20 Leaders Suggest IRGAW Ahead of Summit

In a move that has surprised many in the mainstream media, the G20 group of Finance Ministers and Central Bank Governors from the world's leading economies have proposed "International Reiver Games Awareness Week (IRGAW)" as an ideal way to kick-start the world's economies and avoid a depression greater than that of the 1920s and 30s.

Said Alistair Darling, Chancellor of the UK: "By playing Reiver Games' games with your friends, families, co-workers and random strangers from the street you will be helping to cancel the UK trade deficit, boosting tax revenue and bringing much needed income to the impoverished Bedford area."

Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke echoed: "Raising local interest in games such as the games that Reiver Games produce will help stimulate local economies, from the Friendly Local Games Stores (FLGS) and Online games stores (OLGS) through to the liquor stores where their employees spend their well-earned wages."

German Chancellor Angela Merkel added: "Through their purchasing of games made by games manufacturers in Germany, Reiver Games and their games will help to lift the whole of Europe out of recession."

Reiver Games President, CEO and Grand High Uber Vizier Games, Jackson Pope had this to say: "Huh?" On being pressed he added: "And the irony is I've quit the company due to lack of awareness and low sales."

To participate in IRGAW you can:

  • Play Reiver's games with your friends, family, co-workers and random strangers from the street this week
  • Ask your favourite games store to stock Reiver Games products
  • Demo Reiver games at your games club or a convention
  • Take out a full-page add in the New York Times espousing Reiver games as an ideal way to spend time
  • Buy 1,000 - 2,000 copies of Reiver games to give out as early Christmas presents
  • Take over the world in a Bond villain-esque coup and then force everyone to play Reiver games daily

10 comments:

Steve said...

I vote for option 6.
Now all we need is a plan... and don't forget the important tips for world domination: electrify the really obvious self-destruct button, and set the bomb to detonate with 3:27 left on the timer :-)

(Good post, btw!)

Jack said...

Thanks, Steve, I too vote for option 6, but you've forgotten we also need to buy a white cat. For the stroking...

Cheers,

Jack

Mal said...

Excellent news! All of my lobbying actually paid off. :)

Jack said...

Ah, you were involved in that? I might have guessed. Thanks! I'll buy you a beer in a couple of weeks :)

Cheers,

Jack

GordonBroon said...

If you think I'm following Alistair Darling's advice, then you must be having a laugh.

Jack said...

Hiya Gordon,

I kinda assumed that he was just a puppet, installed to let you continue in your old job while also running the country. I didn't for a minute think anyone was listening to him.

Cheers,

Jack

jogobom said...

I'm still disgusted that the BBC are only showing the anti-globalisation protests. Where's the footage of the Reiver Games fanbase marching on Downing Street, burning their Trivial Pursuits?! Censorship, I tell you!

Jack said...

Hiya Chris,

The BBC coverage does seem to be very 'breaking into banks' heavy - perhaps we should complain about the censorship via their feedback section.

Cheers,

Jack

Ove said...

Ok, I've done the first three... I'm afraid I lack the funds to but thousands if It's Alive - sure it would be worth it but... But I have a plan for the last one ;)
It includes whiscey and communists... Also some screwdrivers...

Jack said...

Whiskey, communists, screwdrivers _and_ It's Alive!? Now you've piqued my interest - care to share your plan?

Cheers,

Jack