Monday, May 12

Carpe Astra - Character Preview 3/4

I've had the weekend mostly off again (stag do this time). I've spent most of today transferring the card text from the spreadsheet I was using to the layout application. It turns out that even using 12pt text I've got room for more flavour text, so I've been bulking out the explanations as I go. This is good, I was having difficulty coming up with a story that fit the limited space of my first guess at how much text I could fit on the cards.

Here's the third character preview from Carpe Astra:

Representing the colour blue is High Priest Ichthon, from the priests. He's an ancient old man, dressed in the ceremonial robes of the priesthood.

Flavour text: Ichthon has been a priest since adolescence, and over the last five hundred years has risen to the higher echelons of the Priesthood. He is a traditionalist, voting in the council for tighter restrictions on permissible behaviour and is always trying to boost the power of the Priesthood.

Finally the sketch the artist has done for him, which is my favourite of the bunch so far:

6 comments:

Avantman42 said...

Minor point:

"Ichthon has been a priest since adolescent,"

should be:

"Ichthon has been a priest since adolescence,"

Jack said...

Well spotted Russ!

Shocking, almost everything I post someone finds a spelling mistake/grammatical error in. I really need to get this stuff proof-read before it goes to the printer...

Cheers,

Jack

Steve said...

I agree - best picture so far. I think I've found my character :-)
(Apart from the fact I'm never allowed to be "blue"!)

Jack said...

The priest does look awesome. No comment about the 'blue' thing though ;-)

Jack

Leigh said...

I love the sketch for this guy but I'm going to offer some feedback on the text if you don't mind.

You use priest or Priesthood 3 times in 2 sentances and it sounds a little repetitive.

Perhaps swap in some words like 'clergy', 'ordained' or 'holy' instead of Priesthood? I don't think it affects the flavour in any way but makes it a little more readable (in my opinion, obviously) On the other hand you may be using Priesthood as the name of the organisation he belongs to but it just reads a little 'clunky' to me.

Jack said...

Hiya Leigh,

Priesthood is the name of the organisation, but I can definitely change things so there is less repetition. Thanks for the feedback.

Cheers,

Jack